I have been accused, on occasion, of using bathroom humour in my speeches and written material. This mystified me until I realized that there had been a misunderstanding.

I always thought the definition of bathroom humour involved the use of profanity and/or foul language. What I had been presenting, instead, was humour that took place in a bathroom. You have to admit, there is quite a difference.

Building product manufacturers are the major clients of the company that I work for. It seems to me that a number of these firms (e.g., the makers of faucets, plumbing fixtures, etc.) would find my brand of bathroom humour to be almost a form of advertising. However, I could be wrong about this.

At my age, I spend a lot of time in the bathroom. I find it peaceful and stimulating at the same time. I do some of my best thinking in the tub. Don't hurt yourself trying to picture this.

Except I can get distracted. Our five-year-old daughter (yes, I'm an old guy with a young family) has a rubber ducky set, a mother and three ducklings. I kid Tammy-Li that they like swimming with daddy best, because I make gentle waves.

She understands the joke, but actually I think it's true. They look really content, bobbing up and down. Plus I protect them from the killer whale that lurks in the deep end. The whale belongs to one of our sons and, all eco-friendly talk aside, it's a really nasty piece of work.

But I'm getting sidetracked again. As for my relations with clients, I am sensitive to their concerns on at least one score. I know that any supposedly amusing stories I tell about the bathroom have to involve human folly, rather than any kind of mechanical failure.

Exploding toilets are a no-no!

Alex Carrick

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